Share and Share Alike

[See Acts 4:32-37]

Sharing is unnatural and complicated.

"Dad tax!” Since I bought the tater tots, I get to have (at least) one of them. It is only fair.

Both of our girls had some of the tots in their laps in the car. Each had a different reaction to my request.

One of the girls freely gave one of her tots to me. Ethereal music started playing and a beautiful light filled the van’s cabin. It was a magical moment.

One of the girls clutched tightly onto her tots. She showed her teeth, growled at me, and ate the tots as fast as she could.

The first response is what we always hope for. The second response is what we typically get.

Sharing is not natural. It is supernatural. It is also complicated.

Even when people decide to share what they have, it isn’t easy. Will your neighbor bring your tool back if you loan it to him? Will it be in good shape if he does? Will your friend who needs to borrow your car care for it in the way you would? Will the organization you give part of your income to actually use that money wisely or be like so many that waste resources?

Sharing is unnatural and complicated, but also it is a reflection of the deep heart of our God. It is the heart of the gospel.

Though it is often hard to believe, our God is a lavish giver. Whether it is the best wine at the end of the wedding feast or the baskets of food left over after a miracle for the multitude, Jesus shows that when he gives, it is not half-hearted. He shares the good that he has, freely- not reservation, no hesitation. 

That is never more abundantly clear than seeing our God the Father gladly gave the Son who was precious to him for those who- by nature- only sought to greedily hoard and stubbornly reject him.

God shared his Son to show his giving heart so that we might have access to the very same giving heart, and the freedom that comes through sharing our lives and our possessions.

"Learn to Move Men, through God, By Prayer Alone"

[Originally a letter to our church’s ministry partners]

“Learn  to move men, though God, by prayer alone.” James Hudson Taylor

To our gracious supporters in life and ministry,

First, thank you for loving us, our church, and the people of our city. 

Oftentimes, learning to live by God confidence (“faith”) rather than self-confidence feels crazy. There are days (especially since the planned merger fell though) where we feel crazy…like we are missing some part of our brain that thinks rationally. The thought is that- if we had that part of our brain- then we would not have planted our lives in Seattle. But, remembering you all, I am reminded that we are loved and cared for by you and by our Father. 

We may be somewhat crazy, but we are not crazy and alone!

Every year in the Spring, I end up reading a book called Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret about the life- and radical Godward trust- of the 19th century missionary to China. I don’t plan to read the book again in the Spring, I just tend to do so. As someone who is often saturated with deep, irrational fears, reading about the life of someone who found soul rest in trusting a Good Father is life giving to me. I am often reminded through Taylor’s life that our Father is trustworthy…even when so many circumstances tell me to act out of mere pragmatism and not wait on the Father to do what he has promised. Doing “what works” when I am fearful seems much more wise than waiting for the good the Father will surely come though on.

Mr. Taylor lived by a principal (and taught it to those who followed his lead) that he would only try to “move men, through God, by prayer alone,” determined never to ask anyone for financial resources, but only to pray and let the Father stir up people’s hearts. He was one of the busiest men who have ever lived, leading a missionary agency to engage the unreached people of China and no one would have ever described him as passive or lazy. He just knew that the things that matter most in the eyes of the Father can only be accomplished by the Father and not what some would call “realistic” means.

A Life Defined by God-Reliance, Not Self Reliance

I have had 3-4 conversations with church goers in the last week who expressed to me that they  do not know if they have faith in Jesus. They have “a faith” (i.e. they are religious rather than non-religious), but they don’t know if they deeply, truly, actively trust the good heart of a Good Father. James (not his real name) loves Jesus and is faithful to his church, but he told me he hasn’t stretched his “faith muscles” for years. Braxton (again, not his name) is a believer who is questioning a lot of what he believes because it isn’t working for him. He is “Christian,” but- in his estimation- he doesn’t know if he has ever trusted Jesus outside of asking for forgiveness. His life doesn’t demand trust.

The most telling conversation was with a man who attends a incredibly large church about an hour north of us. I met him recently through a mutual friend. This church- in his eyes- “has it all.” A rocking band. A good looking preacher. Hundreds of people that he can be around Sunday after Sunday. As he shared his story of how he got to be part of the church, he was deeply moved by the amenities of the congregation. As he “evangelized” me on the attributes of his church over 20-30 minutes, I noticed that he never mentioned Jesus. As a matter of fact, he told me he is not a believer in Jesus, but he was a believer in the church. In his mind, faith in the person of Jesus is irrelevant, unnecessary, and impractical.

I left grateful that he found a church that he can attend and he can hear the gospel. God willing, the Spirit will give him a bigger picture of life with Jesus than what he sees on Sunday morning and the Spirit will lift his eyes (and his faith) towards the beauty of the Savior. 

I will follow up with each of these guys. God is at work in this, creating hearts which are more reliant on Himself.

Faith in Jesus is Not Borne from Faith in Ourselves

One thing that grabbed my attention in each conversation is a very simple truth: faith in Jesus is not borne from mere pragmatism. Only Spirit-inspired trust in Jesus in a person (or people) will call other people to the same kind of faith. Faith in Jesus (and ONLY faith in Jesus) begets faith in Jesus.

Your trust in Jesus reminds me that he is trustworthy. Hudson Taylor’s life of faith inspires me to believe God’s promises. Mere pragmatism has never inspired any more than a deep-seated belief that trusting Jesus is not necessary if we have all of the skills, abilities, resources, connection, and prestige to do what we think should happen.

Or, another way to say it, it is so much more tempting to rely on ourselves instead of relying on Jesus. I am tempted to expect from God only what I can accomplish myself and am often left impoverished in my faith because of it.

But, what if there is more to life with Jesus than relying on our own abilities? What if, our entire lives would be radically reshaped and wonderfully adventurous if we took Jesus’ call to follow him- and the impossible experiences he invites us in to- seriously enough that we cannot rely on “what works” over and above God’s work?

I say all of that to tell you those are the things we are considering here. My faith in Jesus seems so small and so fragile and the tests of faith come so furious and fast. It is head-spinning at times.

The Author of our Faith

“…fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.” Hebrews 12:2

But, with that said, the people around us- both believers and non believers- need to see and hear from people who have an honest, heart level trust- even if it is the size of a mustard seed.  If our friends who do not yet trust Christ will come to trust him it will be because the Spirit uses us to show them that life with Jesus is REAL life. If the people we shepherd are going to grow into people who ache for more than mere church attendance, but long for a life that reminds them that Jesus is real and alive in everyday things, then we must model that kind of faith for them.

Seattle needs people who trust the loving heart of our Father in Heaven so that they will turn away from trusting another old thing that seems good and feels good. Seattle needs people who are learning to trust even when trust doesn’t make sense.

My simple ask of you: would you pray that we would be people who trust the Father in the way Jesus invites us to trust him? For Jesus’ name’s sake. For the good of the people around us. For our own soul.

Please pray that we would “learn to move men, by God, through prayer alone”?

Thank you for partnering with us. You are a gift!

Startled into Reality

The crowds came running when they saw that the lame man was healed. Running.

Those that were there did not expect to be startled. They didn't expect to wonder at what they saw. But, what they saw startled them into wonder. What they saw was the wholeness of heaven reaching down to heal the brokenness on earth.

They were shocked out of the humdrum in order to be humbled. Reality imposed His life on their lives.

But, the miracle of healing wasn't enough to startle them to faith in Jesus. Miracles never are enough to create faith. They are too easy to explain away, even when there is no other explanation for the change in someone's life.

So, Peter began to clarify with words. Words empowered by the Spirit to startle the hearers to see how their unbelief crucified their Messiah. The word from God exposed their hearts, showed them the need for repentance, and opened them up to wonder- not merely in the miracle- but over the One who enters into our reality to bring restoration and times of refreshing.

So often, everyday life with Jesus can seem humdrum. Not everyday will be a day we see the heavenly drama we see in Acts 3, but our God still wants to startle us with the way he is at work. When was the last time you were startled into Reality? When was the last time that repentance seemed life rest and faith felt refreshing?

Times of Refreshing

Where did you go in your head when you read the title of this post? Did you start wishing for a nap… or a trip to some idyllic beach somewhere?

In reading Acts chapter three for Sunday, I was arrested by what seems to be to be an audacious statement from Peter who is preaching to a wondering crowd. He calls out to his hearers, “Repent…that times of refreshing may come…”

“Times of refreshing” I read those words over and over, over and over. Why “over and over”? Because it didn’t make sense to me at first, but I wanted it too make sense.

Maybe this is you at times like it is me: I would love to get a nap in, but everything I am responsible for seems like it is on fire…and I am the only one who can put it out.

Or maybe it is you all of the time. If you are like me there are few times that I feel, “refreshed.” Many times I have a low-grade tension because of a to-do list for my work that needs to be done, a conversation that I am anxious about having, or just whatever is on my mind at the time.

“Escape” masquerades as “refreshment.” I like to watch movies to find something like refreshment. If I can get into a good story for two ours or so, it seems to help…for a time. I escape into someone else’s fictional world for a time, but always have to reenter my own. You probably have your own way of escaping. It isn’t necessarily bad, it just isn’t enough.

Even though these words are Peter’s words in his sermon, in a very real ways they are the Spirit’s promise to us. God the Holy Spirit is inviting us to his refreshment, his oasis of rest. He wants us to find refreshment in him because He knows that we will only find it in Him. That is why it starts with repentance; faith in God’s goodness to give us times of refreshment demand that we turn our back on those sinful things that masquerade as rest and refreshment and turn our hearts to the One who gives his own refreshment and joy!

Join us this Sunday evening as we hear the word of the Lord together and discuss ways that he might bring us into the very refreshment that Jesus himself lived in…and loves to share with us!

Purpose Comes with Rest

Matthew 28:18–20

[18] And Jesus came and said to them, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. [19] Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, [20] teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”

[This part was originally an email set on Saturday, May 24th]

I have this fear that if we walk too much about the purpose that Jesus has given us, I will wear you all out with it.

If you are reading this now, it is probably because you were driven to your email today because you had some sort of responsibility to fulfill. You have stuff to do. Each of us is swimming in “to do” lists, daily anxieties, and overwhelming fears that seem to flood our thoughts and bring us to a point of emotional -and even physical- exhaustion.

So, as not to overwhelm you even more, I am hesitant to remind us that Jesus has given us a purpose. It may feel like one more “to do” that will push us over the edge and into the fetal position on the floor. (Maybe that is just me :)

Yet, here is an off-the-wall thought: what if Jesus gives us his purpose to make disciples because it is the very thing that will bring us rest?

What if Jesus invites us in to his universal plan because he knows that if we enter in his purpose then we will actually find the rest for our souls that we long for, but hardly ever find?

If that is true- and I believe that it is- then I would fail you by not inviting us into Jesus’ purpose. We would fail each other by not helping each other live a life trusting Jesus by showing up in people’s lives to form and shape them to trust Jesus along with us.

It would be my joy to do that with you. Are you willing to do that (and learn to do that) together?

Wonder in the Waiting

Acts 1:4–5

[4] And while staying with them he ordered them not to depart from Jerusalem, but to wait for the promise of the Father, which, he said, “you heard from me; [5] for John baptized with water, but you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit not many days from now.” (ESV)

“So what do we do now?”

I can imagine that Jesus’ friends were asking him that question after being with him for 40 days after his resurrection. “You are here, Jesus. You are alive! Let’s conquer the world, together!” As they stood together, waiting for Jesus to speak, it is easy to imagine that they would be eager to go uproot injustice and confront their Roman oppressors. They wanted to do what many others tried (and failed) to do. The time- it seemed- was “now.”

That’s not a bad idea. But it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t nearly enough for Jesus.

Jesus didn’t tell them to “Go.” He told his eager friends to “stay and wait.”

And this is how Jesus planned to bring his kingdom: through people who would wait.

I am sure those men enjoyed hearing “wait” the same way we respond when we are told to wait on something we want. Or, at least, I know how I would respond if I were there…and my impatience probably would have made the Bible, but not it the good way.

The Spirit of Truth leads us to consider why “waiting” was faithful. Waiting for the Spirit to fill Jesus’ people was the very best idea for Jesus to jump start his mission in his world, ending injustice and oppression by ending the rule of our selfish hearts.

Who Cares?

There are two questions spinning around in my head

1. What is Jesus’ pattern of making disciples?

2. Who cares?

The second question is a little strong, but that’s okay. I think it is the way that most people think…even Jesus’ people.

“Who cares if people become disciples of Jesus?!” We have our work issues to think about. Our finances are always either “out of whack" or “on the brink.” Our health is iffy and our economy is chaotic. We don’t have time for religious “hobbies” like making disciples. Maybe we should leave that to the paid professionals.

Maybe the real question is “what difference does it make” or “why does it matter” if we make disciples?

What if Jesus’ purpose in inviting us to be disciples and calling us to make disciples is more than mere religious duty? What if Jesus invited us in to be a disciple because he knows that it is exactly what we need?!

What if discipleship is Jesus’ process of leading people to the fullest expression of human life.

Maybe Jesus wants us to live fully alive. And, maybe, all of the stuff that seems like a greater priority than discipleship would be radically reshaped by our formation to be more like Jesus.

The plans Jesus has for us (Individually and together ) always, always, always include our discipleship and include our formation through making disciples. Always.

Acts of the Spirit

Matthew 28:16–20

[16] Now the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain to which Jesus had directed them. [17] And when they saw him they worshiped him, but some doubted. [18] And Jesus came and said to them, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. [19] Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, [20] teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” (ESV)

When Jesus called his first disciples to himself, he said to them “Follow me and I will make you fishers of men.” While the disciples were still in wonder at the reality that Jesus had died and was alive in front of them, Jesus told his friends “Go…and make disciples…” They had learned what it meant to “make disciples” because Jesus had shaped them to be disciples over the meals that they ate together, the days they walked together, and the adventures they experienced together.

But, this seems strange to us. Somehow- between Jesus exemplifying his own words and today- we have lost the meaning (and simplicity) of what Jesus said, settled for something different. Something more controllable and comfortable.

As we- together- start on Jesus’ next adventure for us, we will look to see how the Spirit is at work doing what Jesus did in our lives. We will start in a passage in Matthew, but dive into the book of Acts over the next weeks.

Let’s start with one question to consider together : who (or what) has formed you?

What relationships or experiences (or other things) have shaped you to be who you are today?

We are always being discipled (shaped, formed) by someone or something, who has it been for you?

DOUBTS, DISAPPOINTMENT, AND GENUINE HOPE

“After every crucifixion is a resurrection.”

This is always how our God works, but it is still hard to believe. We have had lots of deaths without resurrection, losses without restorations. Dreams for good things that we had in our 20s may have died in our 30s…with seemingly no hope of ever happening. We have lost loved ones. The end of a treasured relationship or death of person has left us feeling lost, defeated, deeply disappointed.

This is what “doubting” Thomas felt after he witnessed Jesus’ crucifixion and death. He had high hopes that died with Jesus. The courage that he had to go “all in” with his friend and Rabbi was spent as he saw that friend overwhelmed by the power of Rome, then the power of death. I can’t blame Thomas for hearing about Jesus’ resurrection and wanting definitive proof. “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.”

Every death, every loss has a different purpose in our God’s way of shaping our lives. Everything that he allows to die becomes the soil that he uses to grow something new, something alive!

He shows this- definitively- in the resurrection of Jesus.

This is hard to believe. But it is true. It’s the center of faith in Jesus. If Jesus isn’t alive then Christianity is merely a myth to study…but not person to follow. But, if Jesus is alive (and he is!) then he is worth trusting wholeheartedly, even through our disappointed doubts.

Jesus Shows Up

A Guest Post from Our Friend, Danette Thrush:

I do not like the cycling and spiraling adrenaline rush and crash of shock, trauma and grief.

Peter is experiencing all these when he goes fishing in John 21. Total trauma. From others. From himself.

Peter's buddies, experiencing the same, tag along.

Muscle memory takes care of the fishing tasks, but can't shut off Peter's mind. He's hyper-processing an arrest he couldn't prevent, accusations he vehemently denied, crucifixion horrors he witnessed with all five senses, the debilitating grief of separation from Jesus for a dark-dead weekend, then the shock of seeing him alive again, but not knowing where he went, what this means, what to do, or where to go. 

Peter hits the open water with his fishing gear and a tormented mind that keeps reliving the events of the past two weeks, traumatizing him again. All night long.

"Early in the morning (after their fruitless night of fishing,) Jesus stood on the shore, but the disciples did not realize that it was Jesus." John 21:4

Jesus shows up.

"He called out to them, 'Friends, haven't you any fish?'" John 21:5

"'No,' they answered."

Jesus invites conversation with his question, one that has the disciples openly admitting the fruitlessness of all their efforts.

"He said, 'Throw your net on the right side of the boat and you will find some.'" John 21:6

When they did, they were unable to haul the net in because of the large number of fish.

Then the disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, 'It is the Lord!'"

Jesus blesses in a way that reveals to Peter and the others who He really is.

"As soon as Simon Peter heard him say, 'It is the Lord,' he... jumped into the water." John 21:7

Jesus means more to Peter than the haul in his nets.

"When they landed, they saw a fire of burning coals there with fish on it, and some bread. Jesus said to them, 'Bring some of the fish you have just caught... Come and have breakfast.'" John 21:9,12

The whole encounter is an invitation drawing them near to be with Him again, to talk with Him again, and to follow Him still.

Jesus, you show up in our trauma places, inviting conversation with your questions to our souls.

You bless again, after long seasons of our own fruitless effort, revealing to us who you really are.

You turn all of it into holy invitations to whole new encounters with you, drawing us near.

You mean more to us than the blessings you give, and you let us realize this right in the middle of the net-full-of-splashy-fish moments as they unfold.

You gift us places to let go, jump in, choose you, and express how much you mean to us, so that we will know it too.

You invite us to follow you. Again. Still. Always. Forever.

Oh, Jesus. We do.

A Common and Compelling Purpose

A good fantasy story often captures something about life that we would miss unless we entered into another world.

I used to think fantasy stories were strange. Honestly, I still do…and there is good reason to think that. Orcs, wizards, and animals that talk are otherworldy to us. When we dive in and immerse ourselves in the strange, new world of a good story we forget our own world for a few minutes…and it frees us up to see our world in a way we often miss. Good stories will do that for us.

One of my favorite parts of the Lord of the Rings books is how the characters become friends, a “fellowship.” Different people from a variety of backgrounds are forced together because they have a common foe and a compelling mission. Yes, I admit it is strange to read about Elves and Hobbits and Dwarves coming together to fight a battle, but what isn’t strange is the truth that is describes.

Here is the truth: real friendship, real fellowship do not come through merely spending some time together (as good as that is!). Real friendship and deep fellowship come through sharing a common and compelling mission. Getting in the trenches together. Fighting unwinnable battles. Facing insurmountable odds to bring about something compelling and good.

That is wired into us. That is how we are formed. That is how Jesus invites us into fellowship with himself and each other. Jesus wants to be near us so he invites us into his mission.

And, somewhere along that path, we find our closest friends have been with us the entire time.

But, ultimately, it is not enough just to find friends- even deep friends, heart friends, life long friends. As a friend reminded me yesterday, we long for friendship with the Ultimate Friend. We need heart connectedness with the God who made us and invites us into his friendship. And, like human fellowship, fellowship with God comes through time with him, walking with him, and sharing a common, compelling purpose. But, that, I’ll have to blog about more another day…

John 15:15: “I [Jesus] no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.”

Philippians 3:10: “I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death…”

Emotions

A Post by Darlene Wagler of Olive Tree Counseling in Seattle

What in the world do we do with our emotions? The messages I hear every day are conflicting.

“Do what is right for you”

“Don’t follow your emotions.”

“Follow your heart.”

“Your feelings can’t be trusted.”

“We just fell out of love.”

“Don’t let your emotions overcome you.”

While the message of the church not to follow our feelings might be a necessary response to the overemphasis of following our feelings in other spaces, I believe that neither message is necessarily correct nor incorrect. While I am no Hebrew or Greek scholar, a quick glance at Scripture doesn’t reveal that the concept of what to do with emotions or feelings is really addressed. The fact that we have emotions is assumed in Scripture, but we are not told whether or not to follow our emotions. I believe this is because emotions aren’t the central issue. Worship is. When Jesus says, “You can’t serve two masters, because you will love the one and hate the other,” we should not conclude that the solution is to try to love money less or try to hate God less. Our emotions are not the problem. The problem is what our emotions are motivated by.

So how should we think about emotions and what do we do with those emotions?

• Emotions can be a signpost pointing us to other things.

  If the fuel light goes on in your car and beeps periodically, I hope that you do not simply turn off the beeping and ignore the warning. I also hope that you do not come to a screeching stop in the middle of the interstate the minute the light goes on, despairing because your life is over. Like our fuel lights, emotions can point us to things we need to pay attention to in our lives. Envy can point to a place in our lives where we feel sadness and need care and attention. Anger can point to injustices in our lives or in the world. Joy, awe, praise, and love can point us to the love of Father dwelling in and through his creation. Rather than trying to silence our emotions or disregard them, we can listen to what they reveal about our hearts. If I decide to do what feels good for me in the moment such as having an affair, the issue is not so much seeking pleasure as it is self-worship.

• Emotions can fuel us to action.

  It might sound like I am saying to allow your emotions to lead you and maybe I am. In the life of Jesus, I see him moved with compassion, healing the sick. I see Jesus fueled by anger, turning over tables in the temple. I see Jesus moved by sadness, weeping with his friends over Lazarus’ death. I see Jesus, enduring the cross, by looking forward to the joy he would feel. We tend to think that our emotions get in the way of objective decision making, but in fact, this isn’t true. Emotions move us to action by helping us feel empathy, compassion, and connection with others. One of the things that can happen when we try to NOT follow our emotions is that we can get paralyzed by the fear of doing things for the wrong reasons. ie. “I would like to lead music in church, but if I want to do it, it must be wrong.” or “If I am angry, I shouldn’t confront that person’s behavior or let them know how it impacted me.” While there is probably wisdom in not bringing the full force of our anger to an encounter or not leading music for the sole reason of getting praise, not doing something just because we feel emotions about it can be unhelpful as well.

• Emotions are not just a human experience

  When I hear people talk about Jesus having emotions, sometimes it sounds like “Jesus experienced emotions so he would know what it was like to be human.” In fact, Scripture indicates that God has emotions. If God didn’t love us or only thought objectively about his Creation, he would have never sent Jesus to die for us. At different points in Scripture, God is said to feel anger, (Numbers 11:1) compassion, (Judges 2:18) jealousy, (Exodus 20:5) joy, (Jeremiah 32:41) love, (John 3:16) and more. The fact that God feels all these emotions also debunks the notion that there are good emotions and bad emotions. We don’t need to only try to feel joy or love; anger and jealousy can be holy emotions as well. What Scripture says about anger specifically is “Be angry and do not sin.” If we think of anger as inherently sinful, we have a hard time understanding this verse. If we understand how to approach our emotions, we can diagnose core issues more effectively rather than silencing the symptoms.

• Emotions transformed by the Holy Spirit are unexpected

  While it is evident that God has emotions, the emotions in Scripture defy earthly standards. For example, Jesus commands us to love our enemies. In Matthew 5: 46-47, 44, Jesus says “If you love only those who love you, why should you get a reward for that? Even the tax collectors do that. And if you are nice only to your friends, you are no better than anyone else. Even the people who don’t know God are nice to their friends. But I say to you Love your enemies and pray for those who treat you badly” (ERV). I can be at least a little nice to my enemies some of the time, but loving them is pretty impossible without divine intervention, especially when we consider that love is not just excusing or explaining away their bad behavior. Another mind-bending concept in Scripture is finding joy in suffering. James 1:2-3 says “Consider it a great joy, my brothers, whenever you experience various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance” (HCSB). Or in 1 Peter 4:13 it says “But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed” (NIV). I believe that these unexpected emotions are possible first of all, because of the power of the Holy Spirit, (Romans 15:13) but also because we worship Someone bigger than ourselves. We can offer love because we have been radically loved. We can feel joy because we know that there is more to the story than what we feel in the present moment.

In conclusion, how we handle our emotions isn’t so much a matter of trying to silence them or follow them, but understanding them as messages, motivators, and mirrors of God’s image. Our emotions can get tangled up with false gods, glorified as gods, or used to worship and glorify God. The core issue is not how we feel, but Who we worship.

Unmanageable Deep

Ezekiel 47:1-12, is a poetic and symbolic picture of what life with Jesus is intended to be. Ezekiel is taken by a river that flows from the temple of God and told to measure it. This river is a symbol of the Holy Spirit. Ezekiel examines what he sees, the river gets deeper and deeper. At first it is manageable, barely a trickle. As it flows on, it becomes so deep that it would sweep the prophet away if he gave himself over to it.

I’ve been swept away down and actual river like that. It is scary. Having something (or someone) take over control of your life is panic inducing. We get anxious and we then we fight. We try to “grasp for straws” as people drowning, desperate for a manageable life again.

We start a series Sunday reminding each other of our mission together as an expression of Jesus’ Church in our city.

You do not need me (or anyone) to try to put together a creative vision for our lives that you are encouraged to follow. You don’t need pithy thoughts or easy memorizable statements to guide your lives. You have everything you need in God’s word and his Spirit.

What we all need is a reminder. A reminder of who our God is and what matters most. It is easy to go to sleep, wake up, do real life, and- through it all- forget what matters to God.

My heart’s desire is that the Spirit would use his Word (and each other) to both encourage us to follow where his River will take us…and have the courage to live in the unmanageable deep.

We start with “expressing that Jesus is our treasure”- or saying it another way- worship.  We plan to walk through Romans 12 over the next few weeks, starting Sunday evening with verses 1 and 2.

Prepare by reading Romans 12. Prepare by willfully allowing the Spirit to have his unmanageable way in you.

Troublemaking

1 Kings 18:17–18: When Ahab saw Elijah, Ahab said to him, “Is it you, you troubler of Israel?” And he answered, “I have not troubled Israel, but you have, and your father’s house, because you have abandoned the commandments of the LORD and followed the Baals. (ESV)

It is as if I (Wes) have two competing desires wrestling around in me. The first desire is the desire to stay on the sidelines, not get in the fight. I want to keep the status quo and- to say it another way- “keep the peace.”

Then there is another desire that barks and fights against the first: the desire to be a troublemaker.

Because I am typically quiet and reserved, the “troublemaker” side of me surprises people. For some, they don’t believe that I can be a troublemaker. That’s probably better, I guess. If I came across as nothing but a troublemaker then that would communicate a message I don’t mean to share.

I read the passage quoted above earlier this week and stopped quickly at Ahab’s description of the man of God he was speaking to. Ahab saw Elijah as a troublemaker. Ahab perceived the prophet as a man whose actions were disrupting the peaceful status quo of Ahab’s reign. King Ahab and his determined Queen, Jezebel, were having their way with the people of Israel; the people willingly and eagerly followed their lead in turning their hearts from the Lord to loving the ways of the Baals.

Elijah was a bump in the road of the Crown’s search for political power. Elijah’s words calling people back to sincere devotion to the Lord was making trouble for the regents in ways no one else would. 

Elijah was a problem that needed to be solved; a man who would not submit to Ahab’s type of peace. In Ahab’s eyes, Elijah was a troublemaker of the worst kind. In God’s eyes, Elijah was creating a kind of trouble that pleased Him.

Peacemaking is, in a way, troublemaking. Yes, there are great dangers in being a “troublemaker” in this way, but, if you are like me, I am more in danger of dishonoring God by my inaction…out of fear working to keep the “peace” that keeps people comfortable in their devotion to anything but Jesus.

I want to be a troublemaker. I want to be a maverick. I want to be a disturber of the peace. But, the kind of peacemaking that disturbs the selfish status quo is not, destructive or selfish. It is, at its root, loving like Jesus is loving. Jesus was not (is not) afraid to disturb our selfish, painted on peace, in order that we might find real peace that comes from life with him.

I am not sure how to do that like Jesus does it, but I want to follow his lead in this. Will you come with me and learn from him? Let’s seek his heart and his ways together!

Patient Vision or Anxious Action?

"It will cost something to walk slow in the parade of ages, while excited men of time rush about confusing motion with progress. But it will pay in the long run, and the true Christian is not much interested in anything short of that." A.W. Tozer

Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices! (Psalm 37:7 ESV)

Sincerest Form of Flattery

Hebrews 13:7: Remember your leaders, those who spoke to you the word of God. Consider the outcome of their way of life, and imitate their faith. 

Can I tell you a secret? My college degree was in “Practical Theology.” Okay, that’s not a juicy secret. Its a boring one, honestly. I can hear what you are thinking because many have the same response: “How can theology be practical?!” At the time I started, I didn’t give much thought to the degree’s name. I just had to choose a course load I was interested in. So…”Practical Theology” it was.

In this case, what “Practical” meant was to train us in certain skills: leading a meeting, preaching, teaching, studying, creating mission statements. Stuff like that. I don’t remember a class on “talking to real humans” or “being there when people are hurting” or “how to be prioritize your family over work.”Those things see more practical to me. 

I bet you would agree.

There is another practical question that was left unconsidered: what makes a “spiritual leader”?  Notice that I am not merely talking about those people (like me) whose income comes from being an official leader. I am talking about those of us who God puts in position of some sort of influence with other people so that they might trust Jesus. That means every follower of Jesus, in varying ways. Does someone have to get a “Practical Theology” degree to be used by God to encourage, build up, and challenge other followers of Jesus?

I bet you know the answer to that question.

I live in a religious world in which we speak of trusting in God’s work through us, but tend to celebrate and rely on skills. The one with the greatest set of skills gets the most attention, the most accolades, the most respect. That is normalized and (almost) unquestioned. In this respect, the “world” I live in is not much different that how the other “worlds” function.

In reality, it is easy to believe that all we need is skill and then we can be an effective leader. That is the default mode in how think about most things. It is often the default mode in how we think about spiritual leadership.

“There is no need to rely on God’s Spirit. We have everything we need in our skills.”

Notice the difference between that thinking and the way of thinking that the author of Hebrews had. Where we seek out greater and sharper levels of skill, the Spirit inspired the writer to focus on faith.

Now, in light of the context of this part of Hebrews, “faith” is not equal to Christianity or a belief system or possibly willful, ignorant “trust” (read: “blind faith”). “Faith” is a substantive, intelligent, reasoned confidence in the God who is alive and at work…reliance on a Person who makes promises and gives us a heart to believe he will fulfill his promises.

The Spirit inspired these words to reshape our thinking on what matters to him. It is not mere “skill” that our God is interested in, but a man or woman who is growing deeper and deeper in a heart confidence in a Father who loves to give good things to his children. 

The main skill (will you allow me to put it that way?) that a spiritual leader needs is not something we can practice like public speaking or throwing a baseball, but an inward posture of child-like trust. People do not need our skills nearly as much as I believe they do. What they need is a model. They need someone who has surrendered to a loving Father and found him to be practically loving. 

The theology that is most practical is the theology- knowing God- that leads us to trust him despite difficult or disappointing circumstances. A knowing of a Person that affects us more deeply than the trouble that surrounds us. 

I am going to go as far to say that the leaders that the writer of Hebrews is talking about are not really Spiritual leaders unless they possess a growing confidence in the Father instead of a reliance on their own abilities.

We want people to imitate our simple confidence in a faithful God, in real life everyday stuff. We want them to believe Jesus’ words, the Father’s heart, and the power of the Spirit. Trusting in our abilities may be entertaining if we do it well, but that confidence will not be life-giving for them.

People need to trust in the One who can (and will!) come through for them. Our role is to model that type of life so that they will say to themselves “I want the authentic faith that I see in him!”

Be (breath) Still (breath) and Know (breath) I am God

Be still and know that I am God: A Post by Darlene Wagler

As I meditated on these words, I began by breathing in the word “God”, reflecting on who he is. Next, I added in the word “know” and took in the ways of knowing God. How does it change when we know God in our felt sense, in our bodies?

When we know God, not as an abstract idea, but whose very breath and life runs through our veins. When we know God like we know a comfortable and familiar grandfather who always took time for us and delighted in everything we did, just because we were his. Like new parents watching their newborn baby breathe, marking every breath with awe, God knows me.

But in the moment, I sensed that I was too full of distractions to know God like that. I was too full of clutter to listen. I couldn’t hear God because I was listening to too many other voices. And then came the words “Be still.”

The context of Psalm 46 describes a cacophony of destruction and chaos. Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall, the earth melts. Is this not our world today? Global wars, global warming, the destruction and polarization is not escaped by the smallest innocent child.

Being still in moments of chaos and pain is one of the hardest things to do. When we stop, we feel the depths of grief and helplessness. We hear the parts of ourselves that have been silenced and exiled. We hear our cries, our longings, our loss, our despair. The waves of pain and aloneness wash over us and we are swept under. In our silence and stillness, we are emptied of the things we use to keep our pain at bay. We are hallowed out in an excruciating process that opens us up to receive with humility what we do not know. As we are emptied, we come to know the truth about ourselves.

We are deeply loved, but we are not special; nor do we need to be. No amount of work or brilliance will elevate our status above others and no amount of embarrassing moments or deep shame will diminish our value and place of belonging.

We are loved because we are his and the best thing we can do is: Be still. And know. That he is God. 

A Confession and A Challenge (from our Celebration Gathering July 30)

Romans 15:18:

"For I will not venture to speak of anything except what Christ has accomplished through me to bring the Gentiles to obedience—by word and deed…”

The Confession: There is Pain in Living Life In Our City

One of the reasons I want mission teams to come is because I can see our city and our life through their eyes. I love taking them to Gas Works Park where they get to see the beauty of our city from far away. But, looking at the gleaming downtown towers and the idyllic lake, they only get hints of what it is really like to live here. But then I send them out walking the streets.

Then they see people living homeless. They smell dried urine on the sidewalk along with messy piles of trash. They notice used needles and hear the honking of impatient drivers. They start to notice that the friendliness that they first encountered wears off and people seem to become impatient and prideful.

I see city through their eyes…and it can be painful. 

There is pain in living here. Pain the teams won’t know because they only come for a week or so.

There’s a reason why people don’t want to move into the city. 

Many don’t feel safe. 

It is crowded. Loud.

Governmental corruption is hidden, but only thinly hidden.

It is expensive. More than I knew. We did much better financially in Texas than here.

Relationships are hard. Most people stay to themselves, keeping a polite distance. It takes extra work to start a relationship and, often,  those relationships tend to be unstable and fragile.

We are deeply grieved that people we dearly love leave because of the city. Though we understand, it still breaks my heart.

I get angry at people in our city. I resent that people will take advantage of the fact that I will defer to them and serve them. I am angry when I pick up trash at Summerfest and I look up and people talk to me as if I am the hired help.

The influence lostness has on my girls…and us…is painful. In one of his books, David Wells states that “Worldliness is whatever makes sin look normal and righteousness look strange.”

We live in a society that celebrates sin and thinks of God’s ways as strange.

This worldiness creates a society that people indulge in, but then want to leave. Sin is self destructive to people and to societies.

The darkness in the city and the darkness in people is darker than I thought it was.

And then there is the matter of whether or not God is at work. I often question whether he is or not. Some days it is clear that he is working and doing good. Some days that understanding seems foreign to me.

There are days I don’t want to be here. Don’t want to invest my life in others. I want to give up. There are days I want to give up everything almost everything in me says it’s not worth it.

The Challenge: Don’t Give Up on our City. Don’t Give up on the God of our City

My challenge is not for you to love Magnolia. Nor to love Seattle. Those are just names given to areas. The challenge is this: don’t give up on the people. Don’t give up on Jesus’ work and his heart for people.

I have long left behind a romantic view of living in the city. Reality is never as romantic as we think it will be.

Now my desire is merely to live a life in which I can look back on 30 years and recognize- wholeheartedly- that Jesus accomplished something through us. To look back and to have have the joy of knowing it wasn’t on my shoulders, not my work, and the joyful burden of people’s lives is his to carry.

You may agree with these words, but still object by saying, “I am not called to what you are Wes”. There is truth to that. What Jesus will accomplish through me will be different than what he will accomplish through you. 

That’s good!  Our callings are only different in who we are called to, who God has placed us among in our everyday lives.

We are called to the same thing: to live a life of love, just as Jesus lived a life of love.  (Ephesians 5:1-2) An “incarnate” life. Present. Available. Compassionately joyful, sacrificially serving, and long-suffering.

First Thessalonians 2:8 says “so we cared for you. Because we loved you so much, we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well.”

I had a very simplistic view of that, thinking that if I loved people in the way Jesus loves people then they would appreciate and honor that. Sometimes that is true, but the reality is that most are left unaffected, guarded, protective, self-absorbed, only looking for what they can gain from others. It makes me want to be protective and self-absorbed too and maybe just lob the gospel at people rather than sharing my life with them.

Sharing life with people can be disappointing. It will be disappointing, but a life lived pouring ourselves out for the good of others is more life and more life-giving than retreating into our self and staying safe. The call to love people like Jesus loves people is not just for their sake it is also for ours.

We are workers together with you for your joy, as Paul said in 1 Corinthians 1:24.

We have a decision in front of us.

It is the same decision for the people of Israel had when the spies came back with a fear laden report that the people in the land were too strong. The decision is real: will we trust what Jesus has said, even if, the circumstances are overwhelming or will we shrink back and miss out?

But here is why our decision is different than theirs. There’s was a one time decision. They made the decision not to go in the land…and they made it once. 

Ours is a daily decision. It is a daily decision, as to whether we will believe what God says or not. Will we believe his character, his power, his heart or will we lean on our own understanding and rely on the way we think about things?

Will we settle for a life that we can control and feel safe or will we follow Jesus to places that are wild and adventurous and out of our control?

Will we follow him to people who are broken and need more than we can give them? Will we follow Jesus to people who are wealthy, seem to have it together, who don’t think we have anything they need?  

Will we look at our own soul and recognize that- in someway- we were just like them before we were rescued by Jesus?

Our calling is not to build a city, but to help bring a kingdom. A kingdom defined by grace. The invitation from Jesus is not to go to the easy and deserving (they don’t exist!) but to love real people who don’t deserve God’s goodness or our love. That Spirit-given grace for others is what will transform our city and its people, from the inside out.

Will you commit to the people of our city since Jesus has committed to them… and only because Jesus has committed to them?

Will you commit to living a life that is out of your control…one that only Jesus can accomplish?

When we run out of patience,  and love, and desire, and hope then we will find that Jesus will accomplish his long-suffering, love, desire, and hopefulness through us. 

Like the Tide Coming In

Long Beach (near the Washington side of the Columbia River) is the longest beach in the world. I was today years old when I found that out. I have even been there and didn’t know just how hallowed the sand was that squished between our toes.

When our family went to play there a few years ago we found out two interesting facts:

1. it is forbidden for people to get in the water because of the rip tides. (What is a beach without being able to get in the water?!)

2. Two, contrary to what I expected, the water isn’t eroding the beach, but building it. The rip tides both threaten swimmer’s lives and create more beach for those swimmers to enjoy.

Slowly, but surely, the beach is encroaching on the water’s territory.

Jeff Christopherson said (my paraphrase) that the kingdom of God is the realm in which King Jesus gets his way. We can tell when Jesus’ kingdom comes when what he wants to happen in the lives of people happens.

When families are drawn back to each other through repentance and forgiveness.

When the “prodigal” comes to his senses, comes home, and enjoys the Father’s love more than the fleeting pleasure of sin.

When the weapons we use to force our will on others through war are reshaped into tools to create and sustain the fullness of life for people.

When the poor have both the resources and the desire to live in community with people rather than the margins.

Many days, I feel like that those days are not coming, but Jesus promises that they are.

His kingdom is not a kingdom of this world (not of the same nature of this world) and it is not as visible as the powers that oppress people and keep us tempted to love sin, but- and this is a huge deal- Jesus’ is bringing his kingdom everyday.

Like the rip tide building the beach, Jesus is creating a realm that wasn’t there before. Wave by wave he is creating a world in which we his heart and his ways are being lived out in real life. I long to be more and more a part of that world.

Let’s live that kind of life out, together.

The Kind of Fear We Long After

Haunted houses. Bungie jumping. Swimming with sharks. Slasher movies. We willingly do things that scare us.

Scary movies have never been my thing. Maybe it is because I am typically fearful by nature, but I just don’t want to spend a couple of hours watching a story that creates fear in me. Though I don’t go see them, not only do many people go see fear-inducing movies- by choice- but they get excited about them! That makes me curious: what does that say about us that we not only want to be scared, but we will even pay someone to scare us?!

I believe that everything we do whether good, bad, or indifferent tells us something about who we are…what we deeply long for. We may choose actions that are destructive to ourselves and others, but even the (twisted) action is a hint to something in our nature that God created for his glory and our good. We are always (at least unconsciously) longing after something beautiful in Jesus even if we seek something ugly from the world.

Maybe we seek to be jump-scared because our hearts secretly long to be full of fear- a Godly fear. Maybe the ways we scare each other are substitutes for something better.

When Jesus calmed the storm that was swamping his boat, his disciples got silent too. They had been in real danger. They had been swamped by real fear. Then they watched as the wind and the waves “bowed the knee” to Jesus of Nazareth, Mary and Joseph’s son. Then, as the scripture says, they were afraid. A deep, profound, life-changing fear. A fear that did not cause them to fight or fly, but to follow Jesus more closely. Awe overtook them. They were awakened to a man who was more fear inducing to them than the storm they just lived through.

Maybe we go see scary movies or jump out of planes or swim with Great Whites as a weak substitute for an encounter with One who would create real fear in us, make us feel smaller than we would choose to see ourselves, but also fill us with a deep sense that  the fear is profoundly good.

Join us Sunday evening as we explore Jesus’ authority over his creation…a creation that willingly obeys his commands. By God’s grace we will encounter the same kind of fear that the disciples experienced…and the same life-giving awe.