The Kingdom of God in the Kingdom of CHOP

“…it is possible to unknowingly participate in the Kingdom of God before acknowledging the value of its Source: the King”- Jeff Christopherson

I am writing to you because I need to. This is as much for me to process what I have seen in the last few days as much as it is to share with you. There is much to grieve in hat has happened in our cities over the last 2-3 weeks and there is much that gives us hope.

In our city, COVID is taking a back burner to CHOP. CHOP (Capitol Hill Occupied Protest) has been the subject of a lot of national conversation and local confusion. There is a lot being said right now- much of it inaccurate and driven by differing agendas- but there is one indisputable fact for those of us in Seattle who are followers of Jesus: we are to be peacemakers where we live. That includes CHOP.

That truth led me to go to the Capitol Hill area of our city and be present to pray and to observe. I was very unwilling at first, but compelled by Jesus’ heart for the people of our city. His kind of love always seeks understanding and only his heart of love will ever compel us to act on the understanding.

With the bright, freshly painted graffiti covering (and re-covering) every concrete wall in the area, it is easy to know when you have entered into the Protest area. Tents lived in by the protestors cover the ground usually empty except for a small group of people living homeless. Discussions are happening all over the grounds and it has a festival-like atmosphere. But, there are printed and painted signs stating “Remember why we are here” to remind the protestors that they have a purpose, a message to communicate to those who are listening.

In order to deescalate a tense situation, the police left the area a few days ago and left it to the protestors on the other side of the barricade. Since that time, the people of what was called CHAZ -and is now called CHOP- claimed victory. They call it de-colonization of Seattle…the beginning of a greater movement. Since that day, people are living their lives at Cal Anderson park and the adjacent streets, creating art and writing poetry that communicates their message. Though we can all agree that the lives of people of color are valuable, that is not the only message loudly and forcefully proclaimed.

I will let my pictures share more clearly than I can, but I want to communicate what I saw. What I saw is a deep, put-your-life-on-the-line desire for what can only be called “revolution.” Revolution is more than reform, it is tearing down what is old and destructive (in their perception) and rebuilding something in its place. The colorful language does not water their message down. CHOP wants to communicate that black lives are unique and valuable and also that the capitalist system needs to be undercut and, at least metaphorically, burned down.

Even though our city is tech-oriented and strives to be the leader in a new era of capitalism, there are still influential groups of people who think it should all go. All of it. Now.

When the Lord told Jeremiah to write a letter to exiles in Babylon and for them to seek the “peace” of the city, he meant a city as confused and corrupt and rebellious as our own. The God of Peace, our God who makes peace, wants his people to love the people of our city by creating truthful, substantive peace.

It is this “peace” (wholeness, fullness, “rightness”) that our neighbors in CHOP believe they are working towards. In my second visit last night, my friend Adam and I got to speak with a couple- AR and JN- from Oregon who drove 4 plus hours to protest in solidarity with CHOP. They and their children are living in tents over the next couple of days, ready to take rubber bullets to the chest if they need to. I asked AR what drove him there (other than his Subaru)…what drives him to all of the protests he takes his family to. AR said that he hates the “world system” that oppresses people and he wants to take a stand. He wants to teach his kids what matters. We got to talk to AR and JN for around 2 hours on the grass in CHOP, hearing their story. All the while, we are listening for connection points to the gospel. (We did get to share about Jesus with them, briefly, but as soon as we started it was obvious they didn’t want to hear anything different than what they already believe, nor really discuss it.)

What I noticed about AR and JN- who are very clearly not believers and who are very openly following a mindset that is unquestionably anti-Christ- is that they, being made in God’s image, have a longing to see the world be “right.” They would fight for the world to be “right.” Though I asked him what that meant, he couldn’t explain it, but he would know it when he saw it. He wanted to make it happen by putting his body on the frontlines of issues he sees as “unjust” wherever that might be in the country. He sacrifices greatly for his cause because he wants to pass on what matters to him to the next generation so they will join in the revolution.

He and Jen are what Jeff Christopherson describes as “kingdom seekers”: those who do not have faith in Jesus, but seem to be (very imperfectly) seeking the Kingdom that Jesus is bringing. They want the beauty of a loving and just world, just without a Loving and Just King to rule their hearts. Of course there is no transformed Kingdom without the Transforming King shaping the hearts of his people, but the “kingdom seeker” still reflect the image of God in such a way that they want to create a new society. Unfortunately, it is not by the power of the Spirit, but by the power of a selfish will and an “I’m on the right side of history, why aren’t you” mentality.

That is what I love (and fear) about the people of our city: that people are passionate for a purpose. They feel that the world isn’t right and want to do something about it, even if they are (knowingly or unknowingly) throwing more fuel on the fire of personal prejudice and other injustices. Though there is so much to grieve, there is also so many ways to hope!

What if the passion the people of CHOP have for justice would be transformed and remade? What if they surrendered to Jesus as king of their lives so they could be a part of the eternal movement that is dependent on God’s Spirit and not the fervor of Marxist ideology?

What if the Spirit called AR to faith in Jesus and AR didn’t spend his life any longer looking for rubber bullets to take on, but would treasure his King enough to put his life on the line among an unreached people group…and his kid’s faith would grow too?

Would you pray for the people of our city? Would you pray that Jesus’ Church would seek real peace among our people? Would you pray that we would have a prophetic voice among our not-yet-believing neighbors that is both truth-filled and full of grace like Jesus himself is?

Celebrating the Marriage of Ashlyn and Colin: A Beautifully Different Love

This is the message that I (gave) at the wedding ceremony of Colin and Ashlyn Smith, Saturday June 20, 2020:

Ephesians 5:1-2
Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

You came because this a day where we celebrate love, specifically the love God has given to Colin and Ashlyn for each other.

What you see in them (even imperfectly) is a beautifully different kind of love.

Love in Real Life: (Live a life of love)

This passage is what God is saying to Colin and Ashlyn today. This is what God is saying to us today. Live a life of love. Love should be the defining motivation of our lives. That is a beautiful sentiment, but it gets real when laundry has to be done or we are pressured to turn in a project that is over due or that talkative friend of ours wants to come over and unload his day on us.

Jesus’ invitation is to live a lifestyle of love. That includes getting laundry done and being hospitable to chatty friends. Love is only real if it is strong enough to be real in the gritty and mundane.

Did you know the purpose of marriage, the meaning of marriage written into the DNA of the marital relationship is more than companionship, more than spending our lives with our best friend, more than romantic love, and more than creating a new family? All of those are beautiful things that God dreamed up for us, but the main purpose of marriage is to picture love. To describe love with our way of life. The purpose of marriage is a dramatization of love lived out in the real life of laundry and bills and unexpected trips to the grocery store to pick up diapers.

Living a life of love means that love defines everything we do in life. It also means that your marriage and our lives paint a picture of love for the world around us that longs to know what real love is.

How We Talk about Love: “as Christ loved us”

The kind of love described here is beautifully different than we expect. We expect greeting card sentimentality, but we find that what we get strong and enduring love. The “love” described here is “more” than we expect and “deeper” than is comfortable.

Everyone we meet will probably have a different definition of love. Love is the feeling we felt after the latest blockbuster movie we got to watch. We use the word love for our favorite foods and our favorite restaurants, and the newest app. We also use it to describe marriage, but we know they mean different things.

The type of love described here is beautifully different than we expect…and defined by the life of Jesus Christ.

We walk in love AS Christ loved us and gave himself up for us. In the same way. Or better still, we live a life of love with the very same love a Jesus loved us with. To understand his love we must start to understand ourselves as he knows us.

Let’s start with the “us” because we know us better than anyone. He died for us…he gave himself up for us. There is a hard truth in this.

Maybe your first thought is like mine was: the thought of deserving love. We talk about people “deserving” love. Our friend “deserves” a fairy tale romance. She worked hard and sacrificed, she deserves love in her life now. We talk about deserving love, but almost no one feels deserving of love. Love that really loves us as we are, where we are, in our strengths and our failures.

Every person in the world was uniquely made in God’ image and is deserving of the dignity that comes from that, but somehow we all feel like we do not deserve love…especially not this full, deep, pervasive love.

We feel that for a reason…hundreds of reasons in fact. We know our own failures. We feel our own guilt. More than that, we know we are bent toward failure. Though we try to push it down and explain it away, it lingers.

Here is the truth, we don’t deserve love.

The bible says that every person fails people, fails themselves, but most importantly fails God. We reject God with our heart and actions. This is called sin. It is the reality of every heart and it is the reason we feel guilty..because we are guilty.

Because to this, the Bible says we are “dead in our trespasses and sins.” Dead. Not just imperfect, but dead…disconnected from the God we were made to relate to…the one our heart longs for…No matter where we look for it, we don’t have the spiritual life we know we are want because we are not connected to the source of that spiritual life.

We cannot try to deny the truth of who we are and pretend we have it all together. As long as we work to think of ourselves as good enough to deserve love we will miss the love Jesus offers.

The hope is that we can embrace that hard truth.

We can embrace the truth because that isn’t the end of the story.

Love Defined: Jesus Gave Himself Up For Us
Though everyone has their own perspective of what love is. This passage says that Jesus defines it for us. This passage points to Jesus’ love as fully, unquestioningly expressed when he submitted himself to the 1st century roman death penalty: a cross

He doesn’t give us a cold, dictionary definition alone: he demonstrates love. His life and his words painted a picture of what full love really is.

Notice, this says something revolutionary about the deepest form of love: as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

This is MORE love. This is full love.

Jesus died on a Roman cross to reveal the extent of his love. To show that a person who loves joyfully gives of herself or himself even to the point of giving away all they have. This is the heart of love.

It says he gave himself up FOR US. For people who do not deserve love. For people who have earned nothing but rejection. Jesus received the death we deserve in order to give us the life he deserves. Jesus expressed his love through his death by taking our place, taking on our guilt and punishment, and taking it on himself so we don’t have to bear that burden.

Even when we are unlovable…he moves to us to show his love.

This is no merely sentimental love. It is a full love. It is a passionate love. And it is a welcoming love. A “I’m going to stick by you no matter what “ love.

This is not a love that seeks selfish goals, but seeks to do what is best for another.

This is the kind of love that never fails even when someone fails us.

This is a forgiving love. The kind of love that willfully chooses not to hold someone’s sin against them.

This is not a blind love that pretends that the other person is perfect, but longs to see the one they love grow in their faults….and works to support them.

This is the kind of love that is not a duty-filled “I was told to love you” kind of love, but a free, full, “I wouldn’t do anything else but give myself for you” kind of love

This is there kind of love that wants the best for the one they love, at any cost.

This is the kind of love that chases out fear and the selfish desire to always have it our way, which creates trust in the one who is loved.

This is the love that Jesus expressed for us at the cross…and the kind he expresses now.

Jesus love makes those who haven’t earned it, haven’t done it all right, welcomed as if they had. He makes an alienated outsider into a beloved child.

We do not deserve love, but Jesus love is so strong he gives it to those who don’t deserve it and will freely receive it.

In a similar way that you are entrusting your lives to each other today, God is inviting all of us to entrust ourselves to him. To receive a love too big for us…and that is a free gift.

Colin and Ashlyn:
Love is anything but safe. Comforting, yes. But not safe. Giving your heart away to someone is never safe. Entrusting yourself to another always makes us vulnerable.

In his book, the Four Loves C.S. Lewis says:
“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”

You two are expressing love today that is willing to trust, willing to be vulnerable, willing to give yourself for the other freely and joyfully.

Your statement of love that you are expressing today is “living a life of love” in a similar way to how Jesus demonstrates his love to us.

Your commitment today and your married relationship that starts today are a living picture, a meaningful message, of the kind of love that Jesus extends to all of us. Your life will demonstrate the heart of Jesus.

Love is different than we expect and more than we are comfortable with.

It is a beautiful and different love because it is Jesus’ love.

The Root

very once in a while as I look in our small backyard I notice a green, snake-like vine that is forcing itself between the slates of our fence. If I am not vigilant, it will slowly, but violently push through into our yard. Then, I have to deal with it because this particular vine is a wild blackberry vine...it brings its thorns with it as it invades our space.

So I walk to the fence, cut it, and throw it back where it came from. "Done!" I proclaim and walk away confidently.

Then two weeks later, two vines start coming through the slats in our fence. Each as determined and damaging as the first. After I cut them and cry "done!" I go back to our house a little less confident that it really is done.

Then two weeks later, the familiar vine creeps through our fence again, unaware and disobeying my decree that it as "done."

The truth is, though I cut the branch with skill and precision, I wasn't paying attention to what causes the vine to grow. When I looked over the fence to what I could not see I was awakened to the reality that the problem is much deeper that I thought. The vine was connect to a quietly swirling mass of vines. That mass of vines was protecting itself and growing quickly in many directions...affecting all of the other plants and fences around it.

And somewhere, deep within the dense mass of thorny blackberry vines, is the the part where the plant gets it nutrients: its root. On my toes, looking over my fence, I cannot see the root. It is buried. It is deep. It is protected. It would be painful- exposing even- to get to the source of my vine problem.

Frankly, it is easier just to cut the vines back every couple of weeks. So, at this moment, the vine exists and grows on the other side of a fence I can't see through. Easily looked over until it bothers me a little.

So it is with prejudice and injustice when we deny the root of the problem.

The root is not systemic as many would have us believe. That is a vine coming from the root, but not the root itself. Reshape the system, undercut the institutions that are built on prejudice or have prejudice intertwined within its DNA and it will seem to die. But, slowly, while we sleep it will come back and form new systems and new institutions. Burn it down and it will rebuild right on the other side of our fence.

The root is something that few want to look at. It is deeper than is comfortable for us and we protect the root from exposure. The root of all prejudice and injustice is our own desire to justify ourselves by putting down another. "I am not perfect, but at least I am not as bad as________________." To justify ourselves we have to create a picture of ourselves in our mind that is better than someone else: prejudice. Pre-judging someone by what they look like, what they sound like, what they act like and then declaring them "not as good" as ourselves.

Or another way to say it...to get to the heart of it all...is to say this is sin. The pride that overwhelms us and controls us so that we will do whatever we can to protect our fragile selves, even demean someone else.

If the root of pride is not uprooted, then the proverbial vines will still creep through our proverbial fences.

The pride of prejudice (and injustice that follows) will only ever be ended when the root is uprooted. That is painful, but that is what Jesus died to do for us. He uproots our pride to plant a new kind of heart. A heart free from self-promotion at someone else’s expense. A heart free to love another with joy even to the point of sacrifice. A heart that is free to create new systems and institutions that will cause people to flourish.

Lament

Lament: Crucifying a Piece of Our Own Heart

Watching the video timeline of what happened in the Powderhorn area in Minneapolis last week, I was stunned silent. There are few times in my life that I have felt that way, but watching how the last few minutes of George Floyd’s life played out, I was so overwhelmed that I couldn’t process it. Should I be mad? Should I be tearful? I couldn’t express anything. I just sat there in silence, unaware that my mouth was open.

Like so many others, I tried to hold on to the idea that this man’s life ended in a demeaning and unjust way on May 25, 2020. George Floyd should not have been killed. The world shouldn’t have to hear another story like Mr. Floyd’s. The world should never have to carry the weight of this kind of injustice.

Not only is this kind of injustice is real. It is also common.

It is the kind of common and pervasive that I, honestly, do not want to deal with. This kind of injustice has affected the African American community uniquely and to a degree that no community should have to bear.

Mere Activism is Never (Deep) Enough

The only way to deal with systematic and personal injustice is to go deeper than we are willing to go on our own…not merely social action. There is something deeper within us all. Along with the real loss of a man who was crafted purposefully in God’s image (which is grievous enough) what we find in the hidden places of our hearts should cause us to lament.

Living in the Soviet Union during the reign of Joseph Stalin, Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn lived as a citizen and an outspoken critic of the country and system he lived in. His conviction eventually led him to incarceration in one of the Soviet’s infamous gulags. Solzhenitsyn was a man who looked into the face of real evil and injustice and wrestled with the underlying causes. Responding to questions about where evil comes from in his book, The Gulag Archipelago, Solzhenitsyn wrote words that are so true that we may not want to hear them:

If only there were evil people somewhere insidiously committing evil deeds, and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?

It is simple to say evil comes from “out there” or “in those people.” Too simple and too safe. It takes courage to say the evil in society starts with the evil in me. That courage is a gift from God. (2 Timothy 2:25)

There is a lot I Don’t Understand, but Something I Do

I am a white man sitting in a predominately anglo area of Seattle. My life experience is not the same at all of those who are protesting the injustice. It makes me angry, but not in the same way and with the same depth as those who now come to expect that kind of treatment. Though I want to fully understand, I honestly don’t.

But, I do understand me. I do understand how easy it is for me to look down on another person because they are different than me. A specific ethnicity or culture do not make a big difference to me. I am color blind in the way that I can be self-righteous towards people. (Please read that again…that’s not a complement to myself)

Because my understanding of my bentness towards looking down on others and using my “power” to abuse others (let’s call that “self-righteousness” like Jesus does), I recognize that I am not alone in that. It isn’t a trait limited to a political persuasion or ethnicity, it is a human problem. As many have said before me, It is the default mode of every human heart and works out in many insidious and sinful ways.

Sin is the root of the reason why we would rather sacrifice someone for our own good rather than giving ourselves- joyfully- for one another. For the sin of racism (both personal and systemic) to be destroyed so must that piece of our hearts that fuels it.

”Repent” is a Reconciling Word
The lament will also lead us to repent. We need to repent of our self-righteousness. We need to let the God who knows our hearts, expose the secrets of our hearts. This is true, not so we will hang our heads in guilt and shame, but that we might re-formed (really “re-created”) towards sacrificing for our neighbors rather than sacrificing them for our wants.

We don’t want to hear the answers. God’s answer will painfully rend our hearts. Being exposed will shine light on that piece of our hearts that we want to hide. It will challenge the perception of “goodness” that we long for for ourselves- our pride in having it together- and humble us.

A lamenting heart that sees the injustice it can create is by far more freeing and transformative than a token gesture on social media.

If I sound self-righteous in my tone, please forgive me. I am self-righteous. Jesus is saving me from my own desire to look down on others so I feel better about myself. That is why I write this. I need to repent. I want to lament my own sin…taking out the plank in my own eye so I can be free to lovingly, humbly, and boldly help my brother with his.

Repentance Means Saying “Maybe Its Me”

I want our first action to be to ask "Could I really be part of the problem?" That's hard because it is exposing. I'm grieving that exposure myself right now because I know how easy it is for me to look at flaws in others to make myself feel better. No one really wants to see what is really in their heart. But, systemic racism will only end through people answering "yes" to the question above and also finding hope that Jesus transforms a selfish heart into a self-less heart like His own.

If you have read this far would you lament with me? Lament the real injustices and the root causes of it: no one is righteous, no not one (Romans 3:10)

It doesn’t have to be loud and overt. It shouldn’t be public or put on. Just let the Spirit of God work in our hearts to help us to grieve what he grieves, hate what he abhors, and (at the same time) live out the times of refreshing he promised. (Acts 3:20)

There will be a time when we will not have curfews every night and there won’t be as many protest posters carried on our streets, but the deep, heart issues will remain. Let’s grieve them then, too.

Lament for a Purpose

Lament in order to love our neighbors as ourselves.

Lament in order that the world might see (and experience) the freedom that comes through repentance and faith in Jesus.

In order that the God whose image every human being bears might be known and treasured. Treasured as the One who allowed his own loving heart to be rent on an unjust cross to pay our penalty for our injustices. (Romans 6:23)

Please lament with me. Grieve with me what God’s Spirit grieves. Pray with me for a broken heart over sin. Not just “their” sin, but our own sin. That is the beginning of severing the root of racism.

"I Did it [His] Way"

In 1974, Frank Sinatra stood in front of a large crowd in Madison Square Garden and told his loyal fans that they were about to "do the national anthem, but you needn't rise." After just a few notes played and two words sung ("And now...") the crowd cheered at a song they recognized. Not "O Say Can You see," but these words:

And now the end is near and so I face the final curtain
My friend I'll say it clear, I'll state my case of which I'm certain
I've lived a life that's full, I traveled each and every highway
And more, much more than this, I did it my way.

The "national anthem." One we sing with fanfare and patriotic gusto. The other we live with (almost) unchecked resolve. "I am going to live my way" is the heart's cry for many and might be the greatest unquestioned mission statement of most of those who call themselves "Americans."

Jesus sees something different, though. He sees something different than we do about our desire to live it our way. He sees into our own lostness that comes from "doing it our way." Matthew says:

Matthew 9:36: ”When he saw the crowds, he had compassion for them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.”

In the crowds of individual people who he walked among who were each (though not American) doing it their way, he looked past the pride and bravado and saw weariness and scatteredness. Jesus still looks at all of the crowds and (with compassion) sees how our self-guidance leads us to places we wouldn't go if we knew where we were really going...and knew what we were losing by not following Jesus' way.

Jesus' invitation to us is to his abundant life, but that abundant life never comes from living merely our own way...following our own course. Abundant life comes from turning our backs on our own selfish ways and following the One who welcomes us into his life...to being with the One who knows where the "life that's full" really is.

Stuffed with Stuff

Adrienne was watching the show "Hoarders" last week while feeding our youngest. I had never seen the show before, but knew what it was and was intrigued with the people who live that way. The questions of "how" and "why" grabbed my attention enough to stop what I was doing to stop and watch.

It took 2-3 minutes for me to walk out of the room, full of an unexpected anxiety. There was a tension in me as I watched a man climbing over pizza boxes on the stairs to get to his second floor: I both like "stuff" and cannot handle "stuff." I felt over stuffed thinking about a life of accumulation and had to walk away. But, I still like my things.

In Luke chapter 12, Jesus speaks to the crowd with words that may seem too personal when he says "Take care, and be on your guard against all covetousness, for one's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions." Now, I don't know what makes other people hoard, but I know what makes me want more and more stuff; Jesus calls it covetousness and he tells us to be vigilant against covetousness.

Why? Because stuff is bad. No, because it isn't where abundant life is. Living a life to obtain and hold on to and to treasure possessions stuffs us full so that we aren't hungry for Jesus' abundant life.

There is a remedy to that longing. A spiritual practice (discipline) that frees us from our hunger after stuff and the security we find in having stuff: giving.

Are we free to be generous? Do we have so much of Jesus' abundant life that we abundantly give of ourselves like he does?

Or are we stuffed full of stuff that we are stuck?

Fasting to be Filled

After a surprisingly overfull week, I (Wes) sit writing this on Saturday morning knowing I want to write something to you. Next to me is my (now) daily bowl of oatmeal for breakfast with the luxury of blueberries to sweeten the meal. I keep pausing in my writing so I can eat what is in front of me...to get the sweet spot of just exactly the right temperature with every bite before it cools off.

I like to eat and I like to be full. That is why fasting doesn't make sense to me at first. Why would a person deny themselves something that is so necessary? Why would someone like me risk the chance of being empty and (I admit it) hangry by abstaining from food?

We live in a "follow all of your desires" world. To abstain from anything we might want seems strange to most. In the search for the most abundant type of life, we tend to consume to find fulfillment, devouring whatever food or entertainment is easily accessible. We long to be full, but can't seem to feed ourselves enough to escape our emptiness.

Our first thought when we think of "fasting" is being empty, but Jesus fasted to be filled. Talking to his disciples as they returned to him after getting his food, Jesus didn't grasp desperately for what they brought him, but he told them that he had "food that they didn't know about." What is this food? What is this fullness?

Fasting is not about merely choosing to be empty but to be more full of what really fills us. Oatmeal is filling for a couple of hours, but we were made for more.

Let's celebrate together that our God is a God who emptied himself so that we can enjoy him who is to us like a soul feast of the richest foods.

Festival Joy Doesn't Need a Festival

Our three month old just did something dramatic and profound. I don't want to be one of those out of touch "the whole world revolves around what my child just did" dads, but I have to tell you about it. I just have to!

She smiled at me when I said good morning to her.

It is hard not to smile when an infant smiles. It seems like everything else that is on our minds melts away when she looks into our eyes and notices (happily) that we are there. There is something that wells up in us, and takes over everything else we are feeling, and we smile back at her!

It is hard not to smile back at her.

Remember what Dallas Willard said: "True Christlikeness, true companionship with Christ, comes at the point where it is hard not to respond as he would." (Spirit of the Disciplines, 8)

One thing that is startling about Jesus is that he was invited to the party. He was welcomed to weddings and to dinner parties. Oftentimes, when he left a people or a town there was "much rejoicing." (Think of a once-lame man going from standing for the first time in his life to leaping and praising God!) The Man of Sorrows also lived in joy!

Though we are living in days where parties are not welcomed and the uncertainty in our lives can weigh our hearts down, we can follow Jesus' lead into celebration joy. Though it is a deliberate act on our part to celebrate, it flows from Jesus' deliberate heart to share his joy with us!

We Are Together in This...for Now

Fellowship

Maybe you have noticed what I (Wes) have noticed. There are a lot of signs that say "we are in this together" showing up around us. At the grocery store, at the park, on ads that pop up on news websites. The threat of the virus does bring us together, in a sense. Every person and every culture in the world is more on the same level than we ever have been in our lifetime.

But (and sadly, I have to write that word), even a pandemic is not enough for us to really come together. Though we are all having similar experiences (similar and not nearly the same), the reasons we normally don't all come together are still there, hidden beneath the "oneness" we are experiencing now.

We all long for what the Bible calls "fellowship." People gather in tribes whether in the jungles of Asia or the wildlands of urban Seattle. People gravitate to others who are like-hearted and like minded. Though I risk over-simplifying here, the reality is that we desire to be connected with people because we are crafted into the image of our God who is, at his core, relational. Personal. Being re-la-tive is written into the DNA of his soul.

"We are together"...for now. But what will keep us together in a way where our hearts are engaged with one another? What has to change (in us?) for us to have to have real, abiding, committed, joyful relationships that not only last, but also stand up during trials like a global pandemic or (maybe worse) a grumpy day?

Join us this Sunday evening (virtually) as we explore the deepest longing of the human soul together and how Jesus himself and his good news what what we need to experience the relatedness we desperately look for.

The Model Pray-er

I have so many questions about prayer.

If God already knows what we need then why does he ask us to pray? (He knows better than we know!)

Do I have to say the right words for him to answer? (I don't know what those words are!)

Do I have to pray with a pure heart for him to pay attention? (I am always in trouble if that is true!)

Those are the philosophical questions...the questions I sometimes ask to cover up my real heart questions. The questions that keep me from praying sometimes:
Does he want to hear what I have to say?
Why doesn't he come through for me when I need him to?!
Does he pay attention to me at all?
Is he even there?

Prayer is often a mystery to us, but it becomes less of a mystery when we pause to look into Jesus praying. There are preciously few times when we get to listen in on what he says, but when we do they are packed with meaning. Sometimes, he prays a lot of words (see John 17) and sometimes he says very little ("Father, forgive them for they do not know what they do").

But every time he prays we can learn from the model Pray-er. We don't learn "12 steps to a better praying you" or techniques to twist God's arm into giving us what we want. What we learn from the model Pray-er is that prayer is the overflow of a relationship, with all a relationship's ups and downs and imprecise messiness.

Prayer is the sign of a relationship God is inviting us into, not the work that creates it.

Pause and Pray

[At random times I will send out reflections on who God is and we see Him doing among us. This is the third of those random musings.]

I feel like I often have just enough words to make it through the day, and no more than that. Because of that, I want them to be meaningful.

Maybe, like me, its not always time that keeps us from praying, but the words. Sometimes we are concerned with praying the right words and the right tone and the right attitude.

My encouragement here is the same is it is on the video. Pause. And while you pause, pray.

Pray because Jesus taught us to, commanded us to, but also pray because you have a Father that wants to hear even your imperfect, broken, stumbling, (and sometimes) badly motivated words.

Pause and pray. Even it it is just a few words, like "please help," or "why, Father" or "I love you."

See the video linked below. More soon.

Wes

Click Here to Watch the Video on Vimeo

I Hate Death

“I Hate Death”

Those words came out of my mouth this week. They startled me somewhat, but I have to admit that they are true.

Death is in front of us all of the time now. And I hate it.

We are tired of it. We are tired of hearing about death, but at the same time strangely attracted to the newest statistics. Death is an annoyance to us so it is easy for us to either keep the thought at arm's length or avoid our own mortality altogether. Now, though, we aren't able to hide from our future reality.

One other reason we are tired of death has little do to with a virus: we all know death is just wrong. Yes. I said it is wrong. Maybe even "unnatural." We know it deep down. We know that death (though “normal” to us) is not natural for us.

Grieving the loss of a cherished companion or being there when someone else grieves upends us in ways "natural" things do not. Relationships (by their nature) are so strong that they were never meant to end. There is not supposed to be a shelf life on loving another person.

The claim of Jesus was that death is unnatural. Yes, even then he was looked at strangely for assuming death has an expiration date because it was so normal for his hearers. The attractiveness of the thought tells us something. We all wish death would die and leave us alone. We all hate death.

When Jesus invites us into his abundant life, it is the type of life that is stronger than death. This type of life is a life where we don’t have to fear death because death does not have the last word in our lives.

Most of all, Jesus didn’t just talk about the dying of death, he lived it. Easter became the celebration that it is because of the hope it gives us: Jesus overcame death by going through it and coming out very much alive!

The heart of what it means to trust in Jesus is to trust that he is the first of many who will overcome death...and the greatest. It is okay to hate death. It will die.

Everything is Lava

Everything is Lava

I never thought that I would be courageous enough to get up on a weekday morning and go grab food for my family at the grocery store. I didn’t think I had it in me, honestly. I had to brave the wilds of our local Fred Meyer and as I walked around store, we could all feel the tension in the air. That’s when I recognized it: everything is lava.

At home, we often play the game “the floor is lava.” That means…we can’t touch it. Its incredibly stressful to be paying for a floor in the living room that my daughter says I can’t walk on.

You feel it too don’t you. Everything is lava. We can’t touch anything. We can’t even be around each other. For some, our jobs are lava right now. It feels like crisis is the new normal, and our bodies, minds, and hearts were not fashioned to live like that for long.

Here is my encouragement: pause. Rest. We feel more stress in more areas in our lives than we have ever felt. This season of our lives will end, but the uncertainties and uncharted territory we are experiencing demand more emotional energy from us than we even realize.

Everything is lava right now, but rest. Think about Jesus’ words to any who would hear him and take him seriously:

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. (Matthew 11:28–30)

Jesus knows that we are living in days of high anxiety and trouble. He knows that simple trips to the grocery store are no longer simple (and sometimes, fruitless…literally). He knows we do not have the capacity to hold up underneath all of the stress that we live under. Jesus knows that everything is lava for us.

Slow down. No, really. Slow down. Slow down before you break down. Take Jesus at his word and come to him to find rest. The kind of rest that will help us not only endure this period of our histories, but will give us a profound sense that he is present with us as we are immersed in crisis.

Jesus is inviting us to rest in him. Its an invitation. Its a welcome. Its also what we long for.

Hungry to Hear

"Teacher, eat."

They were looking out for him since it had been a while since he had eaten. They knew he was tired. His weariness was obvious in the way he sat down determinedly by the well. It was just midday, but the previous days had caught up with Jesus.

The men had just traveled together into town, leaving their master alone to have some downtime. As they came back they were taken aback by seeing the teacher talking to a woman, alone. She abruptly left go into her town, sharing a message that eventually drew the townsfolk to come meet her Messiah.

Sensing Jesus' need to eat, they offered him some of the food they gathered. And, Jesus was hungry, but he was hungry for something more than the morsels they offered him. The mysterious man's response was: "I have food to eat that you do not know about...my food is to do the will of him who sent me and accomplish his work."

Jesus' food was both to know and do the heart of the Father. It filled his soul and he was hungry to hear.

Though Jesus didn't have a copy of the Hebrew scriptures with him or a Bible he could carry around (God's Word was being revealed as he spoke!), Jesus carried the Word of God in him. He had memorized scripture. He was always meditating on the truth of what His Father said in the Law and the Prophets. What the Father was saying defined what he did...and he was hungry to hear.

We are hungry for more than food, but what are we hungry for? Is the very same Word that Jesus treasured a treasure to you? Does the word that the Father speaks fill your soul or are you content with lesser, emptier words?

The Sound of Silence and the Substance of Solitude

Do something with me. At least consider it. Make time for something that I promise you won't like. (This is why I am not a salesman. ABF: Always be failing )

At least not at first.

Take some time over the next couple of days to be silent. Go to a secluded part of your home (where else would you go now?!) and find a quiet place to be quiet. for 15 minutes. 15 minutes doesn't sound like long, but- if you are like me- the first few minutes of the silence might be broken by my counting- outloud- the number of seconds that have passed.

We have an aversion to silence. Most of the time when I run I have to have music or a podcast to listen to. There are many people who feel like something is wrong if they don't hear the sound of the TV in their room. When walk into a restaurant (when we are able to) we EXPECT music. If there isn't music then we get uncomfortable.

The same is true for solitude. We can sit in a coffee shop together, but alone and that is normal. But, stark solitude is scary even for the most introverted of introverts. There is a reason why prisoners behavior is shaped by the threat of solitary confinement.

But, what if both silence and solitude are means to living Jesus' abundant life. What if these practices that we might reluctantly agree to (if lead by God's Spirit) are actually healing to our soul and life-giving. What if it is in solitude and silence we meet with the One our souls' are made for in new, and full ways?

Out for a long, out of the way, walk yesterday on the way to the grocery store and I (Wes) thought I would share some of the thoughts that are on my mind with you from Day One of our Lockdown.

Jesus’ people are the picture of a topsy turvey world being made right again. Perfectly? Not even close, but we are a living sign of what the Lord can do and will do. What our Creator (and re-Creator) does in his world- that which is most important- is always through relationships.

Click here for video

Soulish Security

“And I will say to my soul, ‘Soul, you have ample goods laid up for many years; relax, eat, drink, be merry.’ But God said to him, ‘Fool!…” Luke 12:19-20a

The man was wealthy and entrepreneurial, but he was a fool. Don’t get me wrong, the farmer knew his stuff. Before the above verses it said “The land of a rich man produced plentifully…” and he was shrewd enough to think through what it would take to store the crops.

He knew business, but he didn’t understand life. He was a fool.

He wasn’t a fool because he was wealthy. That’s not the point. He wasn’t a fool because he stored the food. That’s not a bad idea. (To be honest don’t we all want a stockpile of food right now?)

He was a fool because he convinced himself (his “soul”) that he was safe and also secure because of his wealth and his shrewdness. He did not (want to) recognize that his produce came from the Lord of all Creation and the Giver of all good things.

When we get to the heart of it, he wanted to be secure apart from the security that comes in relationship with God.

Its is addictive to read the freshest news report to find out about the societal damage the virus-that-shall-not-be-named is causing. The fear it brings with it is more infectious than the microscopic invader itself. The stock market fell (again!) today. If you have a 401k, it is worth significantly less today than it was worth 3 weeks ago. Small businesses and their employees are hurting already with mandatory shut downs.

And, to top it all off, it seems like toilet paper is so rare it will soon be used as currency.

But, I don’t have to tell you these things. You know them don’t you? You feel the uncertainty. We sleep lighter if we really get to sleep at all. The insecurity we feel is because what we find our security in (“Soul…relax, eat, drink, be merry”) is being taken from us.

Right now it seems that we are in the beginning of it all.

Though there is much more that Jesus says about this heart condition of seeking Soulish Security coming up, he pauses to make us ask the hard questions: Where do I find my security? Where does my heart go to find rest in uncertain times? What do I really put my trust in?

The rich farmer was not a fool because he wanted security and rest for his soul. He was a fool because he looked for that rest and security in barns that fall down and grain that will perish.

Jesus offers himself as the rest and security our souls need. So that we can confidently say to ourselves “Soul, you have a Father who has ample goods he loves to lavish on his children. Enough for the rest of your years. Rest in him. Eat his good gifts. Drink of his living water. Be joyful and secure!”

Though it doesn’t feel like it, our insecurity and uncertainty right now is a gift. A gift from a Good Father who is drawing us to real security in him.

Real Reasons to Worry...and Not To Worry

Can I confess something with you? I tend to be an anxious person. To some it is obvious when they are around me. Sometimes it is unnoticeable. (Or at least I think it is!)

There have been times when people have come to me and said "Just stop worrying." The response that I often keep to myself is "You don't know what you are talking about! I have real reasons to be worried!"

isn't that right though? We have reasons to be worried. Real reasons. We might make those reasons bigger than what they really are, but they are reasons. Nice platitudes of "everything is going to be okay" have no power against those reasons.

One of those reasons may be the threat of an unknown virus.
One of those reasons may be the threat of a lost relationship
One of those reasons may be the loss of job, or money, or livelihood.
Almost always that reason is the loss of control.

Those reasons are like summer heat to a tree. We think of heat this time of year as a good thing, keeping us warm from the long cold of a Seattle winter. But, we know that too much heat- too many real reasons to worry- can dry our souls out.

Are those very real reasons the very last word on the subject?

In Jeremiah 17:7–8, the Lord says to his people:

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
whose trust is the LORD.
He is like a tree planted by water,
that sends out its roots by the stream,
and does not fear when heat comes,
for its leaves remain green,
and is not anxious in the year of drought,
for it does not cease to bear fruit.” (ESV)

The person who trusts in the Lord flourishes in the midst of the heat that causes the drought. The heat is real (!), but the heat is not enough to make the faith-filled person fearful or anxious or barren. There is something about letting the Lord be in control and trusting that he is good at being in control that causes a person's real reasons to be anxious to dry up instead of their soul.

We need a reason greater than the reasons that make us anxious in order to trust a Good Father. God himself knew what it was like to live in the heat. Jesus lived a life where fear surrounded him, where threats were waiting on the periphery to destroy him, where brokenness and sin were the air he breathed.

Experiencing what we experience, he did not fear. On the contrary, he was so full of life (like a tree planted by water) that no worry could hold him back by acting out the fullest expression of love anyone has ever expressed: giving his life for the sake of those who counted him as an enemy. He took the heat of the punishment of sin in order to draw us close enough that we might trust him and be one of these "blessed" people.

The love that God demonstrated at the cross in the life of the Son is a bigger, more powerful reason not to worry than the lists of reason we have to worry.

Drought will come. The inescapable heat of summer will come. The reality of our short existence on this planet is that our desire for comfort and safety will be interrupted by the reality of the unknown, the uncontrollable, and the uncomfortable. Microscopic, unseen invaders will attack our bodies and threaten our "normalcy."

But, perfect love casts out fear. Knowing God's abundant love drives out anxiety when we realize that his love does not dry up in the heat of the real reasons to be anxious.

Disruptive

The Temptation to be Obnoxious
On a bus full of strangely quiet people. The goofy side of me wants to start talking abruptly and loudly on this number 40 bus to draw their attention away from their phones. I’m on mine too writing this. That's probably better.

I’m usually not the guy who disrupts... or at least try not to be.

But as I see the status quo and grow weary of how Jesus has no place in the lives of the people around me... it makes me a little more desirous to shake things up. But that’s not my job. (Good thing) Mine is to treasure Jesus and walk in his Spirit.

Jesus is the Right Kind of Disruptive
The thing is: Jesus is humbly disruptive. (I would be obnoxious) His life among us showed it. He was never satisfied with the status quo. He knew our sinful status quo just keeps us bored and selfish all the the way to our destruction. 

Picture Jesus walking into the temple courts with a zeal that consumed him for what his Father's house should be. (see Matthew 21:12-17) There was nothing weak or fearful about him, no false politeness or capitulation to the "way things are," but only a resilient passion to see His Father honored by his people enjoying prayerful fellowship with the Father rather than seeking unjust gain. So he drove people out of the temple. He disrupted their day, their business, and their lives by acting on what mattered to him.

(Also notice that even as he drove people out with authority, the broken and the weak were not afraid to come to him. They still saw tenderness in his eyes. I long to be like Jesus in both!)

Disrupted the Stranglehold of Sin
Jesus' authoritative love saturates all he does. That love- along with the strength of his humility- is always disrupting our lives..showing us a life better than the sin we think is real life and shaking up our definition of joy. Like C.S. Lewis said “we are far too easily pleased”with the muck of sin and unaware to the playful satisfying joy of all he has for us that sin blinds us too.

Distrupted the Passing Reign of Death
How wide eyed must the disciples have been to see a once-dead man waking? Startled into faith. What is starling is that the most “natural” and widespread of all human functions was not just pushed around but overcome from the inside out.Jesus was living proof to those fear filled men that death isn’t the final word. Death reigned until Jesus did. Because of that, if Jesus is our master than death is not.

Our Desire for Our Lives to Be Distrupted
Now I’m standing in the rain at one last bus stop before I get home and kiss my favorite people in the whole world goodnight. Its raining on both me and the anonymous people standing with me waiting for the 31 bus. Though these neighbors are anonymous, I have met so many people like them who have no room (yet) for new life...no desire (yet) to be disrupted. But that’s my prayer for them now as I type on my phone...that Jesus would graciously disrupt their lives that someday they would worship him for doing so.

Footfalls

"Woe to me if I do not preach the gospel...To the Jews I became as a Jew, in order to win Jews. To those under the law I became as one under the law...that I might win those under the law. To those outside the law I became as one outside the law...that I might win those outside the law. To the weak I became weak, that I might will the weak. I have become all things to all people, that by all means I might save some."

1 Corinthians 9:16, 20-22

Snowmageddon 2019
The snow that has inundated our city for the last few days is melting, slowly. People are coming out of their weekend hibernation and starting to move around again.The snow is turning to slush which will turn to streams sometime soon. At some point I'll be able to dig my car out and brave the hill by our house that has recently been used more for sleds than cars.

Walking is my main mode of transportation while the snow is on the ground and I noticed something interesting as I walked out of our house to meet a friend for lunch: raccoon footprints. They were clearly the footprints of a nocturnal neighbor looking for something to eat at our front door. Poor guy. Nothing to eat here.

But what was more interesting is that it made me notice other footprints...where people had walked. Most (non snow) days we can't tell if someone came up to our door to scavenge some discarded food, but when the snow is carpeting the sidewalks and driveways those footfalls are obvious.

What I Don’t Notice

As I walked to the pizza place we planned to meet at, I noticed people's footsteps like I had never had before. I could see where people had been and, because of the direction of their shoe prints, could tell which way they were going.

Normally, I don't notice. But, I want to.

The more I spend time with friends who are not-yet-believers in Jesus, I realize again a truth I need to hold on to: I need to watch their path of life in order to walk with them. 

When We Never Cross Paths

The reality is that most of our friends who haven't yet trusted Jesus are not going to walk my path; their footfalls will not go the same direction as mine for the most part, metaphorically speaking. 

If we are going to have a meaningful conversation about meaningful things (i.e. Jesus and the gospel) then I cannot expect them to follow the way I am going, I need to walk with them.

I must look to see where their feet fall and go with them. 

Life Interrupted

There are some sinful places I won't go, but most of the time that's not the real issue...the real issue in walking with someone is how much it interrupts my life.

Jesus lived a life interrupted. I imagine that he would start off going one direction during the day and then see someone who the Father had appointed for Him to meet with. Jesus "heard" the heart of the one's around him and responded to that person and that response was not a canned response. There is a sense in which Jesus' life was full of interruptions and changes of plans, but all of it planned by the Father before the beginning of time to draw people in and be enamored with his glory.

Jesus learned our (human) languages. Jesus learned (and joined in on!) human customs. Jesus followed a woman at a well down a path of discussion that went from literal thirst, to her scandalous love life, to who the Messiah should be, to- the heart of it all- who she treasured the most. (See John 4) Jesus became all things to all people pleasing them- not for his own advantage- but to disadvantage himself for them in love.

Or maybe better said "Disadvantaging himself for US in love."

Love that Compels to Walk a New Path

That very same love compels me...even if it is a weak love. I look at my friend whose salvation is ahead of them (God willing) and wonder what will it take for them to hear the gospel in their own language- to get the truth even if they don't receive the truth. What will we have to rearrange or rethink in order to make the gospel accessible to people through play dates, lunch meetings, baseball games, and neighborhood work projects? Those are the places their feet are already falling.

Oh, I want my friend to follow my footsteps and go with me along my path of life, but, if they won't, I have to ask myself "Am I enamored with Jesus so much that I will walk where I have to so that they will be enamored with Jesus?"

There is joy in seeing the paths in which are friends are walking, but it takes courage to reorient life to walk with them- a courage I often wonder if I have. But what if the path they are walking is the very same path that Jesus is walking in order to both win their heart, and strengthen our faith?

Tomorrow, the snow will be gone (I hope anyway) and people's footfalls won't be as easy to notice. God, please help us to learn our friend's "paths of life" by being with them, asking questions, and letting the Spirit help us see their heart questions.